Sunday, November 15, 2009

Politically Accurate

Dear Liberals,

Thank you for taking the time to create a society where not only are people not responsible for their actions, but are given extra consideration for them. The inability to call a spade a spade does not promote anything. Your mollycoddling of society only benefits your own justification to exist.

Political correctness is one example of your over protection. The "War on Terror" had to be changed to an "Over Seas Contigency Operation." "Terrorism" is now called "Man Caused Disaster". Criminals are treated like the victim. This Political Correctness is neither Political nor Correct. I suggest that we replace Political Correctness with Politically Accurate.

To try to better explain how your actions are not positive I will use Politically Accurate Nursery Rhymes to speak on your level and explain what is REALLY happening today.

London Bridge is falling down,
falling down,
falling down,
London Bridge is falling down,
and it is estimated the the Federal Recovery Act will have created or saved 4 million jobs repairing it over the next 3 years,
my fair lady

The was an old woman who swallowed a fly
I don't know why she swallowed a fly,
she attempted to use the government provided health care was put on a 6 month waiting list to be seen by a doctor and tried home remedies in the meantime,
I guess she'll die

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe;
She had so many children, she didn't know what to do;
She gave them some broth without any bread;
Then applied for government assistance now you and I feed, cloth, and educate her children with our tax dollars

In short, please leave the important decisions to those who can and are willing to make them. Though decisions need though leaders not community organizers.

Your friend,

Jason Sanborn
From the soon to be former State of Texas

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

The People Have Spoken

Dear President Obama,

Yesterday’s elections proved that your approval and public support is dropping faster than Bill Clinton’s pants. You are desperately trying to define your administration as the bringers of change. Through all of your past days the “Right Wing Nuts” have spouted time and time again how you have failed. However, I would like to point out one good thing that you have done. You have united the Republican base and brought moderates back to the Right.

You fellow party members in Congress should share in my thanks. For without them, this would not have been possible. Their referendum on America in Health Care helps Americans see the difference in the Parties. Especially with the almost, and by now probably exceeding, two thousand page Bill that they plan to present. The Republicans also have a Health Care Bill. However, theirs is a mere two hundred and thirty pages.

If we were to give these Bills titles the Republican Bill I would think would be called “Sense and Sensibility” while the Democrat version would be “Pride and Prejudice.” However, possibly “Frankenstein” would be a more appropriate title. As, it has been put together piecemeal by people mad with power creating a sort of uncontrollable monster.

Do not worry, when you are down and feeling like no one in America is on your side you can always go to the United Nations. Foreign Dictators seem to enjoy your company as it apparently gives them a sense of power knowing that the American President will bow to foreign kings. Please stay as long as you like.

Your friend,

Jason Sanborn
From the soon to be former State of Texas